Something has come over me within the last few days. I find myself seeking a life I haven't allowed myself to have in the last few years. I was on a mission for reinvention and self discovery and I may have in turn ended up losing some of myself within that process, hiding in my own shadows. I think I used the excuse a lot that I was just trying to do me for awhile. Although I still have a lot to learn about myself (I think I always will, it is an evolving process), I am starting to become more sure of who I am and who I want to be in the world. Now, many people may say, you're thirty-three, shouldn't you have these things figured out already? My response quite simply...no. I think it took all of my experiences, good and bad, to get to this point and really feel comfortable in my own skin. I don't think I will ever be rid my insecurities and doubts, but I know what I want in life now and what I need. I know now that I can't be afraid to put myself out there. I need to live in the moment.
Carpe diem and all that.
I had always envisioned a life for myself that just never panned out. In a way, I am thankful for that. I see now, it never would have truly been my happily ever after. The new revision of life I want for myself has more depth, more soul, and more drive. And yes, the revision still includes my prince charming and my happily ever after. I have not given up on my fairy tale romantic notions.
As I step forward out of my own shadows and look around, I am nervous. Yet, I have never felt more compelled to walk forward into the light and bask in the new experiences and life lessons which will surely follow. As I begin this journey, I know that I have a long way to go, but I am filled with excitement and anticipation that this is going to be a year that I will never forget...
Until next time...xoxo
